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The most common call-out I get isn't a burst pipe. It's a washing machine that won't drain. And nine times out of ten, there's a dog in the house.
I can usually tell it's a dog house before I've even knelt down at the machine.
There's a basket of washing sitting next to it that's been waiting three days. The floor's still a bit damp. And when I open the little hatch at the bottom of the machine, I already know what I'm going to pull out.
Fur. A wet, matted knot of it, wrapped round the pump like something out of a drain.
I've done this twenty years. And a daft amount of my income comes from dog owners who don't know one single thing about what's happening inside their machine, until the day it stops dead with a drum full of water and a door that won't open.
So let me tell you what I wish I could tell every one of them before they hand me a couple of hundred quid for a job they never needed.
When you wash anything with pet hair on it, that hair doesn't rinse away like dirt does.
Dog hair is keratin. It's a protein. And the second it gets wet it turns sticky and clings to everything inside the machine.
Here's the part almost nobody knows. Your normal detergent is built to shift dirt and grease. It cannot break down protein. Full stop.
So the hair just sits there. It works its way down, past the drum, into the filter, and wraps itself round the pump. Month after month it builds up in the places you never see and never think to check.
I have pulled clumps out of drain pumps the size of a cricket ball. Solid. Completely blocking the water from getting out.
And it doesn't happen overnight, which is exactly why it catches people out. The machine drains a little slower. The cycle takes a bit longer. You start hearing it labour on the spin.
Then one day it just stops. Mid-cycle, full of water, door locked. And that's when the phone rings and I come out.
Last month I got called to a house with a big soppy Labrador and a machine that wouldn't drain.
Two minutes on the floor. I opened the filter, and out came a fist of grey fur the size of a tennis ball, sitting in a pool of water that had been trapped in there for two days.
The woman looked at it like she couldn't believe it had come out of her own kitchen.
"That's what's been stopping it? I thought the motor had gone. I was pricing up a new one."
She'd nearly gone and spent four hundred quid on a machine that was never broken. It just had a belly full of dog hair.
A simple filter clear is one thing. But leave it, let the pump burn itself out trying to push water through the blockage, and you're into the hundreds. And the maddest part of the whole thing?
I've done this twenty years. And after watching hundreds of people hand me a couple of hundred quid for the exact same avoidable thing, I started to feel like a bit of a fraud.
It's completely preventable. For less than the price of one visit from me.
People try. I'll give them that. By the time I turn up they've usually thrown everything at it.
None of them can break down a protein. That's the whole problem. Until you use something that actually digests the hair, it stays exactly where it is, quietly building until the machine gives up.
The only chemistry that breaks a protein down is enzymes. Not acid. Not bleach. Not heat on its own.
An enzyme called protease gets inside the hair and takes it apart. It dissolves the keratin the fur is made of, so instead of compacting round the pump, it breaks down and flushes out with the wastewater.
Nothing on the supermarket shelf does this, because none of it was built for a machine with a dog in the house.
I first heard about it from another engineer who does repairs across town. He said his repeat call-outs from dog owners had dropped right off since he started telling them about it.
So I tried it at my own place. I've got two Labradors. I tipped one scoop into an empty drum and ran it on the hottest cycle.
The water that drained out was dark. From a machine I'd have told you was fine. And after what I see on jobs every week, there's no chance I'd run mine without it now.
It's called Draen.
Two tablespoons. Empty drum. Hottest cycle. Once a week. That's the whole job.
It's a multi-enzyme powder that works its way into the drum, the filter and the pump, breaking the trapped hair down so it drains away instead of clogging the machine. It's a maintenance treatment for an empty machine, not something you tip in with your clothes. I run my dogs' bedding through with it too, on the hot wash.
Kind to your pipes and your drains, and it works with every type: front-loader, top-loader, HE and compact.
After the first cycle, you'll see the water come out dirty. That's the buildup letting go. Good sign.
Within a couple of runs the drain speeds back up. The machine stops labouring on the spin. No more standing water in the bottom. And that knot in your stomach every time it makes a noise it didn't used to, wondering if today's the day it packs in, that goes too.
Your normal washing comes out of a machine that's actually clean for once. And you never have to save my number.
"My dog moults constantly and the drum was always full of hair. One empty hot cycle with Draen and the hair flushed straight out. The machine drains properly again and my washing actually comes out clean now. I'll definitely be ordering again."
Charlotte M.✓ Verified customer"I was a bit sceptical but willing to give it a go. I've got a large German Shepherd and the hair gets everywhere, especially in the machine. After a few weekly cycles the drum is cleaner, fresher and clear of hair. Far exceeded my expectations."
Amelia R.✓ Verified customerBy the time one of these packs in, a repair runs £300 to £800 once the pump's gone, and a new machine is £350 to £500. The same buildup starts inside the new one within months. Draen is £24.90. Less than most people have already spent on the vinegar, soda crystals and descaler tablets that were never going to work.
One thing I will say. It sells out. I've had people tell me they went to order it after I mentioned it, left it a week, and by the time it was back their machine had already packed in. If it's in stock when you click through, don't sit on it.
Or you can keep doing what you've been doing. Another vinegar wash. Another slow drain. And you wait for the day it stops dead and you're back to phoning someone like me.
And I know how it sounds. A plumber telling you how to never need a plumber. But honestly, I'd rather you sorted it now than have me round in a year pulling a cricket ball of fur out of your pump.
Draen comes with a 30-day money-back guarantee. No risk in trying it. The only risk is waiting.
Free UK delivery. Ships from the UK.
Two tablespoons in the empty drum, on the hottest cycle (90°C), once a week. That's the whole routine.
Yes. Front-loader, top-loader, HE and compact, all types.
No. If it's already grinding or won't drain, get the filter cleared first. Draen is prevention. It stops the hair building up in the first place so it never gets to that point again.
No. It's a machine treatment. You run it in an empty drum. You can also use it on pet bedding on a hot wash, but not with your everyday clothes.
30-day full refund. No questions.
This article reflects the personal experience and professional opinion of the author and is an advertisement feature for Draen. Individual results may vary. Draen is a household cleaning product for an empty washing-machine maintenance cycle. Do not use on wool, silk, leather, cashmere, down or colour-sensitive fabrics. Keep out of reach of children. Prices and offers correct at time of publishing.